Attention Target shoppers – there’s a creepy guy near the children’s swimwear…
My husband and I have had fun filming. So much fun that we filmed an intro video. We wanted to incorporate all of the things that I do on a regular basis, so of course we had to film me shopping at Target. It is my second home after all. Seriously, when I got in my car after leaving the gym on Saturday, my GPS told me how long it would take to get to Target rather than my house! Filming at Target was kind of fun. My husband was a bit like a nature documentarian, following this big cat in her natural habitat. The only bummer was that he made me put back everything I had put in the cart. Apparently they were just props! What’s up with that? I don’t think I have ever walked out of Target without my arms weighed down with bags. I don’t work out my arms at the gym, these guns are strictly from lugging around shopping bags. (more…)
My daughter’s teacher came out into the hallway this morning at drop off to tell me a story from yesterday. All of the kids were given a piece of paper with a printed poem and a blank space for them to draw a picture. They were told to draw their picture and they would read the poem together when they were finished. Since this is kindergarten, the children are all at different reading levels. My daughter reads pretty well already. I know this because she reads to me every night and the stories she tells me actually match the books. This is a little surprising to me considering she spends so much time with my Dad who is completely unable to tell a story or sign a birthday card without adding his own verbiage. As my daughter was drawing her picture, she was, of course, reading the poem out loud. One of her classmates asked her “You can read?” Her reply was quick and decisive. She said very matter-of-factly “I’m not just a pretty face!” Indeed, she is not.
Last year my daughter took her first dance class. It was a tap and ballet class after school for an hour one day a week. Most of the girls in her grade were in the class so it was an easy sell at first. Then she realized it involved work. My daughter is a little like me, she does not like to overexert herself or sweat. She took a soccer conditioning class a few years ago that had her ready to file a child endangerment claim against me. She literally sat down in the middle of the field several times because she was too hot from running around for two minutes. She raised her hand every time the coach asked if someone wanted to sit out for a stretch. She even raised her hand a few times while she was already sitting out! I suspect her time in dance class was similar. (more…)
I am bad with names. When I am telling a story to my husband I usually have to go into great detail to explain the characters involved instead of just saying “Bob.” This makes my stories exceptionally long. Well, that and the fact that I have a hard time getting from point A to point B without hitting Z, Y and X while veering off track through the other “points” to the story. Yesterday I was attempting to tell my husband that I found out a talent that a Mom of one of my daughter’s classmates has. As per usual, I started at point A and started working my way to point B. Somewhere about mid-alphabet I said “You know, the Dad that looks like he could be an underwear model…” (more…)
I don’t know how my husband puts up with me, I really don’t. I was having a conversation with my daughter this morning about how many bows in her hair were too many and I realized that nobody can really take me seriously since I speak fluently in sarcasm. When I say something looks great, I am usually being sarcastic. When I say someone is smart, I am usually being sarcastic. And when I say I totally agree that I am being a giant A-hole, I am most definitely being sarcastic. That is because I don’t see my sarcasm as anything but really funny. Well, it’s funny to me at least. (more…)
Last year my daughter took her first dance class. It was a tap and ballet class after school for an hour one day a week. Most of the girls in her grade were in the class so it was an easy sell at first. Then she realized it involved work. My daughter is a little like me, she does not like to overexert herself or sweat. She took a soccer conditioning class a few years ago that had her ready to file a child endangerment claim against me. She literally sat down in the middle of the field several times because she was too hot from running around for two minutes. She raised her hand every time the coach asked if someone wanted to sit out for a stretch. She even raised her hand a few times while she was already sitting out! I suspect her time in dance class was similar. 
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