She’s Crafty

She’s a Pistol!

When I was pregnant with my daughter I remember talking with my husband about what she would look like. It was almost like setting our pictures side by side and picking who had the better physical feature. I won nose, eyebrows and bottom lip. He won the rest. My husband is much better looking than I am. I am totally okay with this. Some of the traits we hoped for were more practical, like we both hoped she had my husband’s teeth, straight, white and no cavities. These qualities all cost less and save a lot of pain for all of us. We also hoped that she did not end up with my bow legs and knobby knees. We talked about all of these things having no idea if we would have a baby girl or boy. I think we both secretly hoped she would be a girl and I kind of felt it during my pregnancy. Some things you just know. (more…)

What’s My Age Again?

Thanks from the Owls!

I was the guest reader for my daughter’s class yesterday. I love going to read to the kids, and the little bodies seem to like me. I think it’s because I am like a very large child in high heels. I say what is on my mind and I am awkward when in close proximity to others in silence. These are two characteristics most people seem to outgrow, but I never did. Put me in an elevator with another person and I develop a mild case of Tourette’s syndrome. This is one of the reasons I use the stairs whenever possible. If I am in a small space with another person alone for too long they are probably going to hear about how I got the scar under my lip or why Minor Threat is the best punk rock band to listen to when you work out. (more…)

They Call it Medicine for a Reason

No seriously, it’s chicken noodle soup.


I attempted to make homemade chicken noodle soup the other night. It’s been quite some time since I have actually cooked anything. I am not a great cook. I am a master of salads but heated food it a challenge for me. I have set two stoves on fire in my life. Yes, two stoves. My husband and I used to cook together a lot and when I got pregnant he took over the cooking duties, banishing me from the kitchen. I have not made a meal that requires any form of heat since then. Our daughter will be six in a few weeks, so that is almost seven years I have avoided a stove!  (more…)

Composing a Ransom Note to the Tooth Fairy

My daughter was home from school with an ear infection on friday. After a trip to the doctor we were sent to the pharmacy to pick up an antibiotic. I was trying to insert my credit card into the chip reader while contemplating how she had made it through close to six years without ever having to ingest an antibiotic and now having two within six months. A high pitched voice chirped “I LOST MY TOOTH!!!” My daughter had finally shed her first baby tooth, the one that has been wiggling around for ten days, refusing to pop out. (more…)

Cutting the Cord

Claw hand waiting to reach out…

My daughter has been very clingy lately. I don’t know if it’s the age, or the time of year, but she has been like a fabric softener sheet stuck to my leg. Most of the other Kindergarten parents have started to drop their kids off and let them walk into school by themselves. Not me, I am still making that walk every morning down to my kid’s locker, trailing a few feet behind when I can, trying to become part of the background. She carries her lunch box and backpack as she leads me through the halls, around the corners, all the way to her locker. She puts her things away, chats with her classmates and gets ready for school to start all while I stand back and watch. If I lag behind too much she grabs on to my hand to drag me along. (more…)

Don’t Be a Bergen

She rides with attitude.

I had to run over to Target to buy some knee pads for my daughter. She has been riding her scooter outside since it has been warm and she fell and scraped her knee, so we told her she could wear knee pads while riding just in case she falls again. I was a little tempted to skip the sporting goods section and go straight for the office supplies to buy bubble wrap. She really is my child, she trips while standing still. I found the knee pads and headed straight for the checkout. I would normally stroll around for awhile just in case I needed something that wasn’t on my radar until I saw it but I have a bit of a cold so I am cranky and don’t really want to be out of the house any longer than I have to. (more…)