Unlikely Heroes

Travis Barker photo by Adam Elmakias

Travis Barker photo by Adam Elmakias

I picked up Travis Barker’s book Can I Say: Living Large, Cheating Death, and Drums, Drums, Drums in hopes that I might become a good drummer through osmosis. I am sick of being the dead weight in our family band. I should have known better. Travis says that to become a good drummer I need to practice, practice, practice. Oh Travis, we had a really good thing going. I was right there with you when you talked about being passionate about playing and having heart, but the whole work hard thing is just too much for a slacker like me. I am retiring the dream of forming my own punk band and going on tour, but I am going to start practicing more so I don’t let my current bandmates down. I do have some integrity. I do not have high hopes that this whole band thing is going to go well. In fact, I’m fairly certain I am going to fall on my face, but that’s okay, I am having fun. Now I just need someone to explain to my daughter that Mommy isn’t ruining her band on purpose, I’m just not the same caliber of musician as the other two band members. (more…)

Doppelganger

The last time I was away from my family for a few days was five years ago on a company trip to Las Vegas. I am back again in Las Vegas on another company trip for the weekend. This time my daughter is old enough to know that I will be gone for a few days and she doesn’t like it. None of us enjoy being apart, but it is what it is and it gives her some time to spend alone with her Dad which is something she will no doubt look back on with fond memories. The thing with traveling alone when married is you are constantly looking beside you to share sights and sounds with your best friend and they aren’t there. Walking through casinos without my husband to people watch with is not as much fun. The bad combovers and girls pouring out of their dresses are not as entertaining without being able to give a little look beside me to the one person who knows exactly what I am thinking about each and every one of them. I was missing him terribly last night, and then we walked into the House of Blues for dinner and I almost fell over. (more…)

It’s Vegas Baby!

Now I know why people say “what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.” It’s because they can’t wash their eyeballs. As I was strolling down the hall this morning to get my cold brew iced coffee I ran into what appeared to be two large pimps pulling a hooker out of a hotel room. As I was walking by they were talking very rapidly in Spanish and one was trying to hush the other. I got the impression they were saying something like “Don’t worry, the little blonde white lady has no idea what we are talking about right now…” Now I really wish I had paid better attention in my high school Spanish class. The woman was clearly drunk or high and laughing as she bid farewell to the room guest as they escorted her out. I have never wanted to get on an elevator so quickly in my life. And now I want to shower. Oh Vegas, you do not disappoint. I have never been so grateful to be a boring midwesterner.

Morning Rituals

I swear, her uniform is under there somewhere!

I swear, her uniform is under there somewhere!

I love sleep. It’s one of the things in life I really excel at too. I know you are thinking that this is not really a big accomplishment, but this is an important life skill. We need sleep for our brains to function properly and it is not always an easy thing to do. I can fall asleep almost anywhere at any time if necessary. My daughter inherited this gift of being a very heavy sleeper. This makes mornings a challenge. She wakes very slowly and is usually pretty annoyed that I am there disrupting her slumber. I feel her pain, so I am patient. Some mornings are harder than others. (more…)

Karma

riley-with-the-stomach-fluA few weeks ago we were at the child care center in our gym. My daughter heard a baby crying and like a parrot started mimicking the cry. I told her that it was not very nice to make fun of someone for crying. I don’t think she even realized it was being mean. I asked her how she would feel if someone made fun of her for crying. She stopped parroting and said “poor, sad baby”. (more…)

The Starter House

Landlord BluesFive years ago I became a landlord. My husband and I did this out of necessity when we bought a home for three when we still owned our home for two. I had never been a landlord before but I thought that after having been a renter during my college years and a small portion of my adulthood I knew what it entailed. What I failed to understand at that time is that not all tenants are the same. (more…)

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