My family doesn’t eat fast food often. We eat it so infrequently that when I do drive through a drive-thru I become paralyzed with confusion. My family finds this hilarious, and therefore, try to send me out for burgers and fries as often as possible.

A few weeks ago they somehow managed to persuade me to pick up tacos and I almost had a panic attack trying to order. Somehow since the last time I drove through a Taco Bell the menu has expanded tenfold. I drove up to the menu board and almost started crying based on the sheer number of selections. When asked for my order I panicked and started yelling out numbers like an auctioneer. The volume of my voice increased with each additional question. By the time I was done, my daughter had tears coming down her face and was yelling “SPRITE!” and “CRUNCHY!” from beside me. When we got home I didn’t even know what I ordered or how I spent $50 in a drive thru. I would like to say this is one of those times where I perform a task poorly so I am never asked to perform that task again, but alas, it is not. You really can’t take me out in public.