Who’s the Miserable Shrew?

by | Jan 23, 2017 | Being Awesome, Parenting

 

On sale - the worst of humanity - box of 1,000

On sale – the worst of humanity – box of 1,000

I have a love/hate relationship with Costco. I love the people watching and I hate the worst of humanity that I see while people watching. Yesterday was a prime example of the worst of humanity. We were approaching the center aisle and coming directly at us was a mother and her two children. The boy who looked about 8 years old was busy trying not to walk into a display of Mikasa flatware while playing with a rubik’s cube. His sister who looked about 2 years older was having a conversation with the mother while skipping beside the cart. I caught the tail end of the conversation which went something like this:

Daughter: “…well you compare us to other kids all the time.”

Mother: “That’s because you are a bratty little miserable shrew!”

Wait, what?!? Did I just hear that? I waited for the mother to start laughing. This had to be a joke. But there was no laughter, there was not even a snicker indicating some inside joke. This mother was dead serious. And I hate to point out the obvious but the mother may have been projecting just a little based on the look on her face, otherwise known as “miserable shrew”. She made resting bitch face look like a smile.

We sped down the aisle to escape as quickly as possible while I turned to my husband and asked “I just heard that, right?” He confirmed that I did in fact hear just what I thought I did to which I replied “wow, it’s the mother of the year!!” We spent the next twenty minutes trying to avoid this family with little luck. In fact, the mother was proven right when the little girl passed our cart in between the blueberries and oranges and said “excuse me” as she passed. How dare she be polite to strangers. What a brat!

To all the parents who think they are doing a bad job, do yourself a favor and take a trip to Costco. You will see just how good of a job you are doing. Unless of course you are calling your child a miserable little shrew, and then you are doing a bad job as a parent. But please, if this is you, still go to Costco, you are making me truly feel like the real mother of the year!

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I’m a Square Peg

by | Jan 5, 2017 | Being Awesome, Chick Stuff, Life, Screwing Things Up

I’m still a petulant teenager.

My boss thinks I am an idiot. He doesn’t say it in as many words, but it shows more often than not in his actions. He asked me to do some research on a project for a foreign client. I did the research and gave him and the client the information two weeks ago. He then discussed the project with another individual in the office who is a little like the wizard of Oz, running everything from behind the curtain. She is never wrong about anything and is very happy to tell you how right she is in the form of red corrections on any of your work she sees needs fixing. I call her the red pen lady. She reviews the work of idiots like me who can’t spell their own name without help. We often get this work returned to us with red marks all over it where we missed crossing a “t” or dotting an “i”. Nothing leaves the office before she has approved it. So of course my boss had to get her involved in this project. (more…)

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