Love & Marriage

Love & Marriage

My friend and her husband just celebrated their eighteenth wedding anniversary. I would say they are lucky, but anyone who has been married for a significant amount of time knows this isn't true. They worked hard, they compromised, they sacrificed and they drove each other to the edge of sanity, and they made the choice to do it together, side by side. They earned those years. I love celebrating this kind of love. It makes me grateful that I married my best friend. One of the things that I noticed about this couple is that they laugh together. I think that is the most important part of a relationship. I grew up...

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Someone has to be in charge…

Someone has to be in charge…

Coloring with my daughter is a little like coloring in a North Korean prison. She doles out the markers you are to use and marks your pages indicating where each color belongs. She hands me one marker at a time, only after she has tested the color to see if she likes it, saying "we can share". Little Kim Jung Il comes over to check on my progress periodically and shakes her head at my inability to stay in the lines. She is clearly disappointed in my artistic abilities. This is nothing new. She once got very upset with me because I didn't draw Velma's arms correctly when I tried to help her finish a drawing. She...

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Ask and You Shall Receive

Ask and You Shall Receive

An interesting thing happens when you put your thoughts into the Universe - it responds. If you want something, you need to ask for it. It seems simple, but I think a lot of us have a hard time doing this. I spent a large portion of my childhood learning to be self-sufficient. I was a proud child, declaring "I do it mine feltch!" I never let go of this. I have always tried to do things for myself. I don't need help. My motto could be "I got this." I once drove around for an hour lost because I refused to stop and ask for directions. God forbid a stranger in a gas station think I don't know my way around a place...

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Gratitude

Gratitude

Sometimes I am so full of gratitude that it leaks out of my eyes. And what better day to be grateful than on Thanksgiving. I was standing in my kitchen washing green beans thinking about the people I have met in my life and how grateful I am for all of them, good and bad, the lessons I have learned from all of these interactions no matter how big or small that have shaped me into who I am right now. Thirteen years ago on the day after Thanksgiving I sat eating a pumpkin pie in bed with this guy. I didn't know then that his life and my life would become our life. And today there is one more in bed to share the...

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Unlikely Heroes

Unlikely Heroes

I picked up Travis Barker's book Can I Say: Living Large, Cheating Death, and Drums, Drums, Drums in hopes that I might become a good drummer through osmosis. I am sick of being the dead weight in our family band. I should have known better. Travis says that to become a good drummer I need to practice, practice, practice. Oh Travis, we had a really good thing going. I was right there with you when you talked about being passionate about playing and having heart, but the whole work hard thing is just too much for a slacker like me. I am retiring the dream of forming my own punk band and going on tour, but I am...

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Doppelganger

Doppelganger

The last time I was away from my family for a few days was five years ago on a company trip to Las Vegas. I am back again in Las Vegas on another company trip for the weekend. This time my daughter is old enough to know that I will be gone for a few days and she doesn't like it. None of us enjoy being apart, but it is what it is and it gives her some time to spend alone with her Dad which is something she will no doubt look back on with fond memories. The thing with traveling alone when married is you are constantly looking beside you to share sights and sounds with your best friend and they aren't there....

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It’s Vegas Baby!

It’s Vegas Baby!

Now I know why people say "what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas." It's because they can't wash their eyeballs. As I was strolling down the hall this morning to get my cold brew iced coffee I ran into what appeared to be two large pimps pulling a hooker out of a hotel room. As I was walking by they were talking very rapidly in Spanish and one was trying to hush the other. I got the impression they were saying something like "Don't worry, the little blonde white lady has no idea what we are talking about right now..." Now I really wish I had paid better attention in my high school Spanish class. The woman was...

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Morning Rituals

Morning Rituals

I love sleep. It's one of the things in life I really excel at too. I know you are thinking that this is not really a big accomplishment, but this is an important life skill. We need sleep for our brains to function properly and it is not always an easy thing to do. I can fall asleep almost anywhere at any time if necessary. My daughter inherited this gift of being a very heavy sleeper. This makes mornings a challenge. She wakes very slowly and is usually pretty annoyed that I am there disrupting her slumber. I feel her pain, so I am patient. Some mornings are harder than others. We started today with me asking...

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Karma

Karma

A few weeks ago we were at the child care center in our gym. My daughter heard a baby crying and like a parrot started mimicking the cry. I told her that it was not very nice to make fun of someone for crying. I don't think she even realized it was being mean. I asked her how she would feel if someone made fun of her for crying. She stopped parroting and said "poor, sad baby". Last Monday my daughter went to school sad after sending her Grandma Deb back up north after a weekend visit. Riley was sad about her leaving and she cried at school that morning. A classmate of hers made fun of her for crying. When she...

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The Starter House

The Starter House

Five years ago I became a landlord. My husband and I did this out of necessity when we bought a home for three when we still owned our home for two. I had never been a landlord before but I thought that after having been a renter during my college years and a small portion of my adulthood I knew what it entailed. What I failed to understand at that time is that not all tenants are the same. Our first tenants seemed pretty good on paper. It was a mother and her two daughters along with her fiance. They were only there for about nine months when they asked if they could erect a six foot privacy fence. I found...

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